Justing Sitting Here...

As I sit here, I am readily thinking of Mari this morning. I sit here with a smile on my face at how that little angel could uplift the lives of so many while at the same time I have a dog at my feet just whining to get up on my lap and have some attention.

It amazes me sometimes at how much my life has now changed from over a year ago. I was a stay at home mom taking care of a severely autistic child. My life was almost all consuming with making sure Mari was watched almost all the time as you did not know whether she would escape through a window somewhere in the house or would find the extra key I had hidden in the house to unlock the deadbolt to door so she could go play in her own little world outside.

I have always wondered what kind of world she had lived in. I think it must have been nice. It was like she could go away and escape everything that was around her. I think we all wish we had that ability sometimes to just escape the life around us for a little while. This is partly what made Mari so special. I can remember just watching her as she would just start to laugh at what seemed like to you absolutely nothing. I mean there was nothing she was playing with physically. She wasn’t watching anything on TV and she wasn’t doing anything but just sitting there. She could just laugh though. It was so neat to just watch her sometimes. I guess those are some of the things I truly miss the most. But to be able to look back on those memories at least puts a smile on my face while at the same time having me miss her all the more.

I love you baby girl and mommy misses you so much.
Love Mommy